I’ve always come across magazine articles about singletons being left behind as all their friends succumbed to the ball-and-chain married life. They voice varying opinions about not wanting kids, or envying stable relationships, or wanting to “settle” but not liking the idea of a marriage certificate, etc etc.

How about happily married folks who often look back and sigh?

Well, sometimes I do.

I enjoyed my single life and independence so much, that now and again I find myself, thinking what it would have been like to stay single all these years.

A singleton friend from America stayed with us recently. I was really looking forward to it as much as she did. It was her 3rd time over & she was going to hook up with some “bloke” she met last time she was here. We booked her post-bday bash and we planned a night-out. Hubby volunteered to stay with Kelvin (long story).

The eve of my FIRST proper nightout in London, I realised a number of things:

One, I don’t have anything to wear. All my clothes were office-wear and those that aren’t, aren’t “glam” enough. Que horror. I can’t turn up at a nightclub in my jumper!

Two, I have self-imposed curfew. I tried my best, but my involuntary reflex was to keep checking my watch and my phone. Every hour I “touched base” with hubby to confirm where we were.

Three, when the suggestion came up to move to the party to a house somewhere along the Docklands, I can’t join them. I found myself actually telling my friend “it’s not my scene” anymore. I wouldn’t belong in a singleton’s party without my hubby. The atmosphere will not be the same for me.

Coming home I told hubby that I’d love to accompany my friend on her Europe trips. But I know she will not enjoy it as much as I would. I’d have to bring Kelvin with me or the entire family, and being single once I know that’s not “her scene” either.

When you’re single and adventurous you don’t want to be lumbered with a child. It’s going to cramp your style if you’re on the prowl. And how is she supposed to see the night-life in area if we turn around and tell her she’d have to go on her own or that we can go but only for 2-hours?

I am finally enjoying my married-with-a-kid life in London. I have managed to attend drink-do with my current officemates. I thought it’s not far-fetched to think I can start going on night-outs. The logistics are hazy but I thought I could invite a few kindred spirit, perhaps hubby and I can book a trusted nanny…

It really just hit me how different my life is now.

That’s James McAvoy. I met him last week while watching the “Last King of Scotland”. I couldn’t get him off my mind since then. At first I was apprehensive he will be like most men that catch my eyes these days - younger than me. Well, he is but only by 2 years not 10. So I guess we can make it work, as long as his wife doesn’t find out. Oh yeah, my hubby is best kept in the dark, too.

Nak ng tokwa naman kasi! Look at those sexy eyes and what could possibly be the second most kissable lips on Earth (hubby’s is the best! — hi Mahal). I saw his bum on the film while he was cavorting with Idi Amin’s “third wife” (real life, Kay was Amin’s second wife). hihi -> yup I giggled & felt really nice all-over. “TURNAROUND, HOT STUFF!” But he couldn’t hear me.

I guess even if I wasn’t impressed with the book, I’ll have to watch “Atonement” to see him again.

auee@swooning

UPDATE 12 Sept AM:
Hubby claims to looking like my dreamboat. HMMM