As I savour my first paycheque in 2 months, I resist the urge to pull at my hair. It is frustrating working for a startup company. The fact that 2 of the 3 developers left does not help matters. Now I cannot just disrupt the remaining engineer’s time! I wanted to persist so I can move forward… but hey it’s 4:40pm. It can wait tomorrow morning.

In the meantime, I will catch up on my emails, my blog-reading, and I went for a long lunch! We’re near the Leather Lane street market and I’ve finally bought a pair of low-slung shoes. Really cheap, just £15. I wanted to buy 3 vests for the £10 asking price but I controlled myself. I need to work out my budget first before I splurge. Afterall, I’ve got lots to buy tomorrow: Mothercare stuff for more safety kits and Marks & Spencer’s lingerie — I’ve got a voucher that needs using!

So today after the heat of yesterday, I will relax as it’s nearly end of play. I will get on the 5:40pm train, read my paper, read the gloriagate transcript & relax some more. Then arrive home, do my accounting & maybe catch a bit of telly. My goal is to be in bed by 10pm. I’ve got an early day tomorrow, it’s my turn for the school run!

Yesterday was my 16th birthday. Maligayang Kaarawan sa akin. Salamat.

Ang wish ko ay:
Sana kumikita pa din ako ng malaki kahit wala na kong trabaho.
Sana mag-pension na ako at the age of 35.
Sana I wouldn’t have to work. Sana maging ampunin ako ni Bill Gates.

Ang selfish, siempre birthday wish hindi naman beauty pageant wish for World Peace ‘no.

Reality check. There I was sitting at home too lazy to even bathe. Gad that’s the most pathetic birthday scenario I’ve ever seen. Pathetic but not sad. I spent the whole day with my 14-month old son whose boundless energy drained me of my will to even cook pancit. Every time he takes a nap, I also snore beside him. Every time he wakes me up with a giggle, I respond with a hug. All day we did nothing but play hide-&-seek, throw-things-everywhere-mum-will-pick-up. We also ate everything in-sight including my maja blanca. By 9pm, I was still washing the dishes, readying for bed while Kelvin’s puckered lips wet the pillow.

Too bad Mahal wasn’t there to celebrate my natal day.

Same day as yesterday’s. Arrived here at 930am, been surfing the net since then. I’ve been thinking of people I haven’t emailed yet so at least I’ll have something to do. Some people would say I should make myself useful because I’m paid to sit here… But to be honest naubusan na ko ng “useful” things to do. I’ve already cleaned out my test servers, my databases, re-arranged my SQL scripts, rewrote my test templates & I’ve even cleaned out the problem tracker (6 months’ worth of bugs!).

So here I am again.

Gusto ko sanang magsulat ng tula o ng kwento pero wala naman akong maisip. Para talagang natuyuan na ko. Sabi ng mga pro dapat daw sumusulat ka araw-araw kahit na ano para lang masanay ka… Pero ang hirap.

Tapos, as usual, di naman ako pwede umuwi ng maaga, mga 6pm pa ko pwedeng umuwi e. Pero mas late pa dahil leaving-do ng dakilang manager ko who just told me na ang test driver ko e next week ko pa magagamit. Great. At least I can tell our CTO it’s not my fault hehe

Habang nanunuyo ang labi ko at di makahinga sa sipon, eto ako at nagkukunwaring nagtatrabaho. Gusto ko ng umuwi pero di naman pwede. Siempre I’m paid to turn up at work. So tuloy ang pretense.

I’ve been sat here for nearly 4 days(!) doing mostly nothing. I’ve been driven to drinking coffee at least twice a day to stay awake. This is significant because it’s boiling hot in this non-airconditioned office in London.

It’s not my fault I’m idle. More than one week na kong nag-a-antay sa dev manager namin na tapusin yung test driver ko! Since he’s resigned and just counting the days ’til the leaving-do, eto kulang na lang e hagupitin ko ng latigo.

Alin ba ang mas mahirap, walang magawa o sobrang dami ng ginagawa?

Look I’ve no plans to blog, no plans to write, pero eto sumusulat ako dahil wala nga akong magawa. I keep wishing my home’s next door so I can nip out and do the washing, cook a meal, etc etc. But hey baka magalit si Lord I keep ranting when I should be thankful I have a job.

Okay shutting up now.